Monthly Archives: September 2011

Church in Kakopetria

An elderly nun walking into Kakopetria church

The quaint small village of Kakopetria sits within Cyprus’ Troodos Mountains, which is famous for its collection of UNESCO Heritage-listed painted churches from the Byzantine era. Inside these churches, brilliant murals are accentuated in gold, depicting holy Orthodox icons. Scattered throughout this mountainous region, the churches vary from small stone structures to enormous monasteries. Closest to Kakopetria is the small stone church of Ayios Nikolaos tis Stegis (“Saint Nicholas of the Roof”), which uniquely features 2 roofs and murals dating from the 11th century.


Svalbard and farting sled dogs

Imagine this: you’re sitting in a dog sled, sliding comfortably and silently through the powder white snow surrounded by a gorgeous mountain landscape. Seems idyllic, and that’s how the brochures sell them. But when you’re on the sled, it’s a different story. Whether you’re sitting in the sled or standing on it, the odour of dog fart wafts past you at high speed, and doesn’t seem to go away. Some experienced dogs actually manage drop a few poop nuggets while they run, and you try not to squeal with your mouth open. Your eyes start to water, and you’re wondering what you got yourself into as you zoom past the (beautiful) landscape at a dangerous 50km/h.

Sliding through the silent landscape

Most people imagine sled dogs to be cute, fluffy dogs who love nothing more than mush on command. However, real working sled dogs are wiry and lean – a product of running around the Arctic for 12 hours nonstop if you let them. All they want to do is run. The moment you harness the dogs to the sled, you have to put a brake on them – otherwise the dog and your sled would be miles away faster than you can say “F***”.

Excitable dogs

Needless to say, learning to brake is the most important element of sledding – without it, you’ll be dragged through snow, stones and ice upside down. It’s not like they know where to run to – the lead handler usually has to stop and point the dogs to the right direction.

The real fun in mushing is going over little streams, across holes in the snow or up and down steep inclines. There’s little chance of injury, as you’re surrounded by fluffy white snow and dressed in a puffy overall. Unless you encounter a polar bear looking for fast food.

Adorable Husky puppy!

What most people don’t realise about the dogs is that they don’t ever get washed (so you can smell them before you see them). Even so, these dogs do crave affection and enjoy a good rubdown after a run. If you’re lucky, you get to go to a puppy farm to play with tiny, fluffy, blue-eyed Husky puppies before they turn into huge, stinky, excitable sled dogs.

With just 45kms of roads in Svalbard, the only ways around the back country are by boats, snowmobiles and of course, dog sleds. Local mushers can take you into the adjoining valleys for half-day trips, past glaciers and herds of grazing reindeer. You’ll ride in pairs – one driving and one sitting – and learn how to “mush” on the fly. The landscape – with glaciers and snowy mountains – is amazing, and with hardly a visitor for miles around, the trip truly makes you feel like you’re riding in the final frontier.

Svalbard, the northernmost of Norway
Located 1,000km north of Norway, this once no-man’s-land now has the trappings of a modern city, minus the crowds. With more than 40 nationalities among its 2,000 residents, it’s definitely the Arctic’s most cosmopolitan place.

Nothing but pure scenery the whole way

Longyearbyen is the unofficial capital, where you can get everything from reindeer tom yum to Wifi access. In summer, it experiences the midnight sun and is home to Arctic creatures like reindeer and Arctic foxes that can be seen wandering around town. Most visitors come to spot the elusive polar bear (stuffed bears can be found pretty easily), walruses and seals – all of which can sometimes be seen on ice floes near the airport.

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A (cold) Barrentsburg scene

A boat ride (or sled excursion) away is the Russian coal mining town of Barrentsburg, home to 400+ residents. Those with a fascination for all things Soviet (dreary buildings, stone-faced Russians, etc) will find this settlement  – with its snowed-in buildings and soot-covered streets – a kooky gem. Don’t bother drinking at the bar – they only accept e-roubles.


Quote of the Day

“There is no bad weather,
only inappropriate clothing.”

Ranulph Fiennes


Proboscis Monkey in a Tree

A juvenile proboscis monkey

Visitors to Bako National Park in Sarawak, Malaysia, sometimes come here to try and spot the park’s celebrity – the proboscis monkey. Long associated with a certain French actor for their trademark schnozz, these pot-bellied primates can sometimes be seen in large troops numbering 20 or so. Very vocal and playful at the same time, you should avoid standing under a cheeky juvenile – in case they decide to show you the meaning of ‘golden shower’.


Seychelles: Rude plants at Valée de Mai

Most visitors to Praslin Island in Seychelles go for one thing: its beaches. But when the sun has grilled their skin to the consistency of crispy bacon, many head to the hilly, shady interior of Valée de Mai National Park – which is conveniently located between the 2 main beaches.

Plenty of freshly-baked day-trippers make a stopover at this World Heritage site. It’s known for the country’s largest virgin collection (about 600 trees) of the native Coco de Mer palm, the fruits of which resemble something out of a sex shop in Japan.

You've gotta be nuts to buy this

For starters, it is pretty big (for a nut, that is) – they can weigh up to 30kg and are about the size and (pretty detailed) shape of a woman’s hip area – both back AND front. You’ll see plenty of tacky postcards advertising this fact. The similarity is uncanny – the bum curves, the cracks, and even the, ahem, front bits and bristles. Because of its rather rude shape, early explorers got very excited over this discovery, prompting General Gordon (a very serious chap) to declare the Coco de Mer as “the true seat of carnal desire”. There is also a male version of the palm, which (naturally) sprouts something of a phallic nature. This led to  General Gordon declaring the Valleé de Mai as the Garden of Eden, and the Coco de Mer as the forbidden fruit.

In fact, the ‘nuts’ were so popular in the 18th century that they’ve been harvested to near extinction for their giggle value. Today, these palms are protected (there are only about 7,000 trees), but you can still buy the nuts as part of a sustainable industry. Since each one has to have a certificate and ID number to deter nut poachers (yes, there’s even a black market for them), they’re probably the world’s most expensive nuts, going for about S$300-S$600 each. That’s not all – each licensed souvenir shop is only allotted 2 nuts a month!

The trail of palms

Visiting the Park
The park’s shaded almost completely by palm trees with leaves larger than a beach umbrella (some 14m long!). The different species of palm are highlighted by the park brochure, but most visitors don’t bother with brochures, preferring instead to go in large group tours that follow the park’s shortest route. Who could blame them when they’re wearing beach flip flops on a nature trail?

Away from groups of Russian or French tourists, the park is tranquil, save for the occasional call of the black parrot. It’s one of the rarest birds in the world because it lives ONLY within this tiny park. However, finding the bird is challenging (often with negative results), involving lots of neck craning, patience and buzzing insects.

As it is a UNESCO World Heritage Site (it’s one of the smallest), all the trails are well-marked and well-maintained, the longest of which loops around the park and takes in the park’s hilliest points in roughly 3 hours. The only thing steeper than the park is its entry fee, which is at €20.

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WANT MORE STORIES ON THE SEYCHELLES? READ OUR ‘PRASLIN: PLEASURE ISLAND” PIECE HERE.


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